India has advanced so much. Women education, women empowerment, etc. We see women becoming all rounders in corporates, sports, politics, any industry you pick.
Indian parents are so proud when daughters achieve success. They brag and share with society.
When the same daughter marries and becomes part of the new family, everything that her family was proud of is taken for granted. Not only that, she is expected to be at par with the daughters-in-law of the generation before.
No one is proud of her achievements anymore, rather it is less talked about. If someone else praises her, it is received with a pinch of salt.
Moreover, her achievements are kept hidden, less talked about but the same family will talk loud and proud of their daughters and sons.
The heartbreaking thing is that older women of the families do this.
We live in the era of Selective Patriarchy which is more damaging because the girl has to keep changing her mindset and stance depending on whether she is at her parents’ home or at in-laws’.
Unknowingly they end up accepting it so much that they don’t realise when they become part of this and pass it on to the next generation.
It is time we take a breath, a pause and reflect where we are headed and consciously break the latest generational trauma.
himalayaswithin 
I agree. the society is changing but slowly. though in many families we do see visible transformation. We also see examples wherein the Father in Law would deliver home made hot meal tiffin to his Daughter in Law at her office same was as a father would have done for his daughter. But, such families are less in society and more numbers of families and husbands are still not coming out of ancient patriarch mindset. But, surely this should not be allowed to pass onto the next generation. Someone a close family member said very apt reality that why we see more numbers of marriages breaking in current generation and one of the important reasons is that when current day boys look for matrimonial alliance, they like to get a life partner who is equally educated, career oriented, independent personality etc etc but the moment they get married they expect the same life partner to act like a house wife and current day girls will not, or rather should not tolerate this. and this results into breakage of relationships.
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Hi Thanks for reading my post and responding to it. I do agree that there is a change in motion. However, I wanted to highlight a more subtle, deep seated behaviors that go un-noticed. Like, on surface, there would be equality, equal care and opportunities. Yet, sometimes a subtle remark or a non-remark when there should have been recognition brings forth a deeper mindset that the person itself would fail to understand. They may feel that they are doing great in maintaining equality between daughters and daughters in law, but a subconscious difference still remains. And, I think it will take a long time to resolve, which is fine, as long as we start breaking the loop by taking conscious effort.
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This blog speaks an uncomfortable truth with deep clarity.Empowerment that ends at marriage is not empowerment at all.Selective patriarchy silently erases a woman’s identity, making her achievements invisible where they matter most.Real progress begins when pride, respect, and recognition follow a woman into every home—and when women themselves choose to break this cycle for the next generation.
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